ECW One Night Stand (It Didn't Suck!)
Last year's ECW One Night Stand was a nostalgic, seemingly final, fond farewell to the greatest wrestling company that ever was. So, when another ECW PPV was announced for this year, we were all somewhat skeptical. When it was also announced that ECW had been "resurrected" under the auspices of the WWE, well, then we really got skeptical. The PPV was last night, and, long story short, not only did it NOT suck, it really showed some promise for the future of the new ECW offshoot of the WWE. Here's the rundown.
Taz vs. Jerry the King Lawler: Not really a match, mostly just an excuse for Taz to choke out the King. Let's move on.
Kurt Angle vs. Randy Orton: As part of his move to ECW, Kurt Angle has now developed a new style of wrestling that's eerily reminescent of the Ultimate Fighting style (which, in many ways, is now the WWE's top competitor). Angle used this new style to pretty much maul Orton for the almost the entire match. What little offence Randy was able to execute seemed limp by comparison. Long story short, Kurt eventually slapped on the Anklelock, grapevined the leg, and Orton tapped, leading to a round of "You Tapped Out!" chants from the crowd. Great match (although Orton gets zero credit for it. He got carried the whole match).
Rey Misterio Jr. vs Sabu: Why was the crowd booing Rey? The dude is one of the best wrestlers in the world. Don't boo him. Anyway, this match ruled. Flying bodies, flying chairs, and broken tables. Kick ass all the way around. The ending was a bit of a let down (they called the match because both wrestlers were "ahem" unable to continue), but everything up to it, including a Flying DDT through a table suspended between the ring and guardrail, ruled.
The FBI (Little Guido, Tony Mamaluke, and Big Guido) vs. Tajiri and Super Crazy: This match was great too. There was lots of great grappling, lots of hard striking, and lots of high flying. The only downside was after the FBI won the match, the new ECW version of the Big Show (insert groans here) came down to the ring and mauled the FBI. Tell me again, why exactly is the Big Show in ECW? Anybody?
Edge, Mick Foley, and Lita vs. Tommy Dreamer, Terry Funk, and Beulah McGillicutty: I had lots of reservations about this one. Foley is supposed to be retired, Funk is now in his SIXTIES, and Dreamer hasn't wrestled since last year's show (well, he wrestled a little bit before this show, but that don't really count). Throw in the fact that Edge sucks and that the ladies were something of an impromptu addition to the match, and you have a recipe for disaster. Imagine my surprise when I witnessed one of the best matches I've seen this year (that didn't take place in an ROH ring, anyway). Violent, brutal, ugly, and totally freaking awesome on all fronts. There were barbed wire boards, lengths of barbed wire, barbed wire baseball bats and 2X4s, and even a little fire. Blood was shed, and Funk had to be cut out of a barbed wire board in the end. Not surprisingly, Edge won the match in the most heelish way possible, pinning Beulah. Killer match.
Masato Tanaka vs. Balls Mahoney: An unannounced filler match, that was still quite good. Balls broke a steel chair over Tanaka's skull.
Before the main event, Eugene (ugh) came out, killed some airtime, and nearly got Caned to death by an obviously inebriated Sandman. Moving on.
Rob Van Dam vs. John Cena: Welp, one match had to suck. Too bad it had to be the main event. Van Dam worked his ass off to make the WWE's Golden Boy look like Superman. Unfortunately, Cena failed to take the opportunity to shine. The crowd hit it right on the money when they chanted "Same Old Shit" at Cena. After several agonizing minutes of Cena blundering around trying to make the crowd not boo him, Edge came out of nowhere and speared Cena through a table (Actually, Cena took such a lousy bump, that in many ways, Edge speared himself through a table). RVD then recovered and hit Cena with the 5 Star Frog Splash and pinned him to win the title. Hooray!
So, what's my hopes for the new ECW? First, I hope that the quality of matches remain at least this high, or get even higher. Second, I hope that Dreamer and Funk don't kill themselves. Third, I hope that if ECW is going to serve as a makeshift WWE training camp (like the rumors are saying), that the up and coming talent will actually have to wrestle like they're in ECW. Fourth, I hope CM Punk is brought in and let loose. If that happens, then ECW will truly be the brand to watch.
Taz vs. Jerry the King Lawler: Not really a match, mostly just an excuse for Taz to choke out the King. Let's move on.
Kurt Angle vs. Randy Orton: As part of his move to ECW, Kurt Angle has now developed a new style of wrestling that's eerily reminescent of the Ultimate Fighting style (which, in many ways, is now the WWE's top competitor). Angle used this new style to pretty much maul Orton for the almost the entire match. What little offence Randy was able to execute seemed limp by comparison. Long story short, Kurt eventually slapped on the Anklelock, grapevined the leg, and Orton tapped, leading to a round of "You Tapped Out!" chants from the crowd. Great match (although Orton gets zero credit for it. He got carried the whole match).
Rey Misterio Jr. vs Sabu: Why was the crowd booing Rey? The dude is one of the best wrestlers in the world. Don't boo him. Anyway, this match ruled. Flying bodies, flying chairs, and broken tables. Kick ass all the way around. The ending was a bit of a let down (they called the match because both wrestlers were "ahem" unable to continue), but everything up to it, including a Flying DDT through a table suspended between the ring and guardrail, ruled.
The FBI (Little Guido, Tony Mamaluke, and Big Guido) vs. Tajiri and Super Crazy: This match was great too. There was lots of great grappling, lots of hard striking, and lots of high flying. The only downside was after the FBI won the match, the new ECW version of the Big Show (insert groans here) came down to the ring and mauled the FBI. Tell me again, why exactly is the Big Show in ECW? Anybody?
Edge, Mick Foley, and Lita vs. Tommy Dreamer, Terry Funk, and Beulah McGillicutty: I had lots of reservations about this one. Foley is supposed to be retired, Funk is now in his SIXTIES, and Dreamer hasn't wrestled since last year's show (well, he wrestled a little bit before this show, but that don't really count). Throw in the fact that Edge sucks and that the ladies were something of an impromptu addition to the match, and you have a recipe for disaster. Imagine my surprise when I witnessed one of the best matches I've seen this year (that didn't take place in an ROH ring, anyway). Violent, brutal, ugly, and totally freaking awesome on all fronts. There were barbed wire boards, lengths of barbed wire, barbed wire baseball bats and 2X4s, and even a little fire. Blood was shed, and Funk had to be cut out of a barbed wire board in the end. Not surprisingly, Edge won the match in the most heelish way possible, pinning Beulah. Killer match.
Masato Tanaka vs. Balls Mahoney: An unannounced filler match, that was still quite good. Balls broke a steel chair over Tanaka's skull.
Before the main event, Eugene (ugh) came out, killed some airtime, and nearly got Caned to death by an obviously inebriated Sandman. Moving on.
Rob Van Dam vs. John Cena: Welp, one match had to suck. Too bad it had to be the main event. Van Dam worked his ass off to make the WWE's Golden Boy look like Superman. Unfortunately, Cena failed to take the opportunity to shine. The crowd hit it right on the money when they chanted "Same Old Shit" at Cena. After several agonizing minutes of Cena blundering around trying to make the crowd not boo him, Edge came out of nowhere and speared Cena through a table (Actually, Cena took such a lousy bump, that in many ways, Edge speared himself through a table). RVD then recovered and hit Cena with the 5 Star Frog Splash and pinned him to win the title. Hooray!
So, what's my hopes for the new ECW? First, I hope that the quality of matches remain at least this high, or get even higher. Second, I hope that Dreamer and Funk don't kill themselves. Third, I hope that if ECW is going to serve as a makeshift WWE training camp (like the rumors are saying), that the up and coming talent will actually have to wrestle like they're in ECW. Fourth, I hope CM Punk is brought in and let loose. If that happens, then ECW will truly be the brand to watch.
1 Comments:
I'm gonna burn in hell. A friend of mine was going down a to-do-list and one of her entries was to find a church/spirtual meditative thing. "ny suggestions?" My response? I can teach you the book of John. John Holmes, that is.
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